I sat on those planes and I did nothing but think. The journey to Vegas from Manchester was just shy of 10 hours and gave me plenty of thinking time. In between watching films such as "How to be Single" which made me sob into my travel pillow (that film is my life over the last 12 months - i'm not even kidding), and napping on and off, I reflected quite a lot on how things have changed for me even since January and how it's time to change something.
Quite honestly I think in the weeks leading to America I panicked. There was a situation I wanted to sort out. A situation I had panicked in and become somebody I'm not to someone for fear of being hurt like I was back in January, but I realised during that journey you can't live in constant fear; you can't tar everyone with the same brush and presume one persons going to do the same as another because it's not fair.
But this is what this trip was about. I wasn't running away from my problems like I'd been told, I knew I wasn't going for three months because I wanted to come home, make amends with someone and hopefully move from there. I was simply going to enable me to come home and start a fresh. Put the first 6 months of 2016 behind me, and come home ready to be honest with those around me and hopefully get what I wanted. This far from happened, but more on that later.
**
Cowboy Paul was every bit of what I remember from my trip last year. He spoke with such softness and meaning as he asked me how I'd ended up here again and told me all about the events which had happened in his part of the world over the last 9 months.I told him I wanted a cowgirl hat this time and before meeting up with the group he took me around endless shops, trying on hats with me, telling me which colour I looked good in and which didn't suit me at all. We laughed, giggled and soon the conversation turned from serious to funny. Paul has always been a good listening ear; I remember back last year we spent several hours riding next to one another just talking and whilst he offers the best advice, he never presses for information but always knows what to say in reply. Sometimes his responses make you think "why on earth has he said that", but I soon learnt, once you pick it apart, they have meaning and clarity.
The group took a while to shop some more so once I'd gotten my hat we found some children outside one of the shops selling lemonade and had a couple of cups. It amazes me how different this country is to ours and it makes you wonder if Britain will ever be safe enough to let its children sit outside some shops selling lemonade to make some money.
Finally it was time to head back to the ranch and for Paul to give me an american driving lesson back to the ranch. I wasn't overly impressed with having to drive straight away having just had the most hectic 24 hours of my life, but I did it. When I told my mum and sister I'd finally arrived they both replied telling me to go and rest for a couple of hours as I hadn't had chance to at all, with all the stress of getting there. My reply went something along the lines of "you've got to be kidding, as if that'll happen" and I was right as upon arrival I was told after lunch we were going riding. I was exhausted and quite honestly felt the least enthusiastic about riding as I'd ever felt.I was given the lovely Hazel to ride at first. Standing at roughly 15.2 hands and a true lady, Hazel gave me a lovely ride in the round pen. My friends back home weren't surprised to find she was a coloured as I always seem drawn to them! She was mannerly, responsive and very much like the lovely Tina that I'd fallen in love with last year, just seemed to love doing her job!
After a couple of hours playing tag and several other things in the round pen we were told we were off to round the cows up and send them up into the mountains a little more. I couldn't help but think I'd much rather be riding Tina when doing that as I know how much she loves it and how much I enjoy herding the cattle on her, however Hazel seemed just as eager and equally as competent. By now the sun was starting to set and I hadn't realised the time at all until I took my phone out to take a picture. It was 9pm in the evening and home seemed like a world away.
I sat in silence watching the sunset in front of me and home seemed the topic at the forefront of my mind. I couldn't help but think about the texts I wanted to send, but was struggling to find the words for and more.
Thankfully after another half hour in the saddle the cows were where they needed to be and we turned for home. I was exhausted, jet lagged and couldn't think of anything better than getting into my sleeping bag and hopefully waking up the next day slightly more refreshed and ready to go!I slept like a log that evening but woke up the next day feeling more tired than ever. I always seem to struggle with jet lag - more so on the way home, but I think I'd been feeling so exhausted lately that it was finally catching up with me.
Tuesday was another filled day, with us first getting up to do chores and then heading out to get our horses prepared to drive to the cassie trail, which is a beautiful ride. It was an eventful morning as we watched the stallion cover two mares in the hope that both would become pregnant, rather than just one. He was slightly confused and frustrated when it then came to putting him on the trailer with the same mare next to him, but after a bit of kicking and testosterone flying around, it was decided the safest thing to do would be to move him to the front of the trailer with just a gelding, close the small partition and then put the mares at the back. Mind you, who can blame him!
The cassie trail is a beautiful ride, the trail leads you up several steep tracks until you get to the top where you can see for miles over the mountains. It really is breathtaking and despite it being my third time up there it still stopped me in my tracks and took my breath away, exactly like it did the first time. There really are no words to describe the views and no photograph anyone takes will ever do it justice. You really do feel on top of the world, quite literally. Everyone seemed to enjoy themselves and those in the group that weren't riders were pleased with their achievements of riding up there.
Soon enough it was time to head back down and load up ready to go back to the ranch. Once back, Hannah the wrangler and I had to take a couple of horses to the vets in the nearby town roughly half an hour away. A couple were having routine checks for an up and coming clinic, and another seemed to have an infection in the leg, so Hannah wanted him to get checked out to ensure there was nothing underlying going on. It was also the perfect opportunity for me to pop into the petrol station and grab some bits to eat and coke - there's only so much water you can drink!The vets were absolutely lovely and intrigued to know about the veterinary centres back home and whether ours differed to theirs. It was great to have a chat with them and one things for sure - american veterinary centres don't seem to be half as busy as ours!
Finally we headed back to the ranch, had dinner and before long it was bed time ready to get up early the next day to ride the North fence!
*
A 5am start the next day wasn't on my agenda but it was nice to wake up just as the sun was rising, but a shame I missed it with the camera. I'd asked if I could ride Tina as I was quite keen to get back on her and have a good canter.
By 6am we were all loaded up in the trailer and on our way to the North fence. The plan was to ride around it all, check if anywhere needed patching up and then wrangle the horses there from one field to another. Tina was an absolute pro at wrangling horses and I loved nothing more than wrangling them on her - she was fantastic.It was nice to get to know one of the other group members a bit more as we spent most of the ride chatting about why we were here and so on, but it made a nice difference than riding alone, which is what I usually end up doing.
After we'd checked the fence it was time to wrangle the horses back in. Plan A didn't quite go as we'd hoped, so I shouted to Paul to take over from me as lead horse and I'd go behind the horses to push them. Thankfully he agreed and I finally got my chance to do more than a walk on Tina and off we went into a canter, pushing the horses forward and scooting left or right to direct the strays back into the group.
I can't describe the thrill you get when it comes to wrangling and everything goes to plan. There isn't a feeling quite like chasing the horses and pushing them to where they need to be, watching them gallop there and knowing you've helped do that. Once we'd got the horses into their other field the vibes throughout the group was fantastic - for them it was the first time they'd experienced something like it and I was on cloud 9 that I'd gotten to experience it again.Before long we were loading up and heading back to the ranch. One thing I really wanted to do that I regretted not doing the last time I was in America is having a go at driving the truck and pulling the trailer, so I asked Paul if I could drive home. He looked at me like I was absolutely bonkers (I hope my driving wasn't that bad monday!) but allowed me to have a go. Slightly nervous, I pulled off but soon enough realised it was easier than I thought it was and I began to relax!
Back at the ranch we were given the opportunity to ride a horse we hadn't ridden before. For me, the obvious choice was Stanley the stallion as I'd always wanted to have a go. Again, he'd covered a couple of mares in the morning so was a little full of it to say the least. To be quite honest he absolutely finished me off as he spent the best part of our ride bucking and just wanting to head to the mares. However, who can fault him - it's his natural reaction. It was a different ride to what I'm used to, to say the least and by the end of it I was absolutely exhausted. How the stallions are taught to be ridden with mares here compared to there is very different and I must admit, I'm not used to the way we were told to deal with him.After a while I was exhausted and having not had a proper rest since getting there, I got off and headed outside to the pool to grab some sun and relaxation before it was time to get ready for the Rodeo that evening. I spent the afternoon chatting to another group member again about life back home and our backgrounds which was nice, but it felt good to finally get some make up on and head to the local bar for a drink and then onto the Rodeo for an evening out!
Hurry up with the next part x
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